Why Is It So Hard To Meditate?
The perception amongst many of us is that meditation is tough to do. The foundation of this belief is an experience that so many of us have had. You sit down to meditate and try to empty your mind but find that it’s about as easy as lifting a 500 KG weight above your head at your first session in the gym. But why is it so hard to meditate?
Emptying your mind is not easy. Relaxing is not easy. Switching off is not easy.
A glimpse into how tragic this ‘clear the mind’ situation is would become apparent if you could somehow be in my head for the duration of my typical meditation session. I have meditated virtually every day for 25 years which probably qualifies me for multiple black belts. Before you mistake this for ego, the most interesting thing first-time meditators would notice (in my head) is that my mind doesn’t stop in at least half of my meditation sessions. I would hate to hazard a guess at actual percentages, but after all this time, a large portion of all my meditation sessions are still consumed with my mind whirring away. But I don’t get frustrated or beat myself up about it; I just observe what it’s doing.
So, if a self-proclaimed black belt meditator still deals with a whirring mind, we would be wise to question whether meditation is as difficult as we think?
The Benefits Of Meditation
Within two generations, we have gone from meditation being considered a super niche and pretty out there activity, pursued by nearly no one, other than a small handful of Westerners; to something that is now widely and culturally accepted. There are not many of us left who would look at meditation habits and think them weird or pointless. Although I’m sure, there are still a few holdouts.
So, we more or less agree that meditation is probably a good thing to do, especially when we consider how overstimulated we are, how we never shut off, and how this impacts our well-being and general state of happiness.
Busy minds are often not the happiest of minds.
If we can agree that meditation is probably beneficial for pretty much all of us, we can definitely agree that it’s likely to help those struggling with their brain ‘health’. People with PTSD, depression, anxiety disorders, and stress, together with those dealing with the downstream physical impact of these issues, like, IBS, psoriasis, addictions and insomnia. Most likely, these people stand to benefit the most from meditation but equally may struggle the most to meditate ‘effectively’.The benefits of meditation are far-reaching. We can expect a reduction in stress, anxiety and depression symptoms – reduction of PTSD and trauma symptoms, increased resilience, better sleep, elevated mood and improved relationships, greater productivity, increased ability to focus, and fewer physical complaints. Although this is an impressive list, it’s far from conclusive based on what meditators report and research supports.
The Trouble With Meditation
The most significant trouble with meditation may not be meditation itself. But more the fanciful archetypes that have driven its adoption in the west. A Zen master or Buddhist monk floating on a cloud in a deep state of peace, mind completely shut off. I suspect the real problem with meditation is this romanticised version of meditation, as opposed to the perceived problem with meditation, which is that it is difficult to do.
To back up this theory, we have the rise in popularity of ‘mindfulness’. The great thing about the mindfulness revolution is that it doesn’t tap into the same set of idealised concepts that are applied to meditation. Mindfulness is more allowing of the fact that we have busy minds.
The teaching of mindfulness is far closer to the authentic teaching of what meditation is; enhanced awareness or the application of our self-awareness as a muscle. Applying awareness as a muscle suggests that the muscle will be pretty weak when it first gets exercised. Even better, it doesn’t imply that we need to switch off a brain instantaneously. So, the popularity of mindfulness highlights the real problem with meditation—our idea about what meditation is.
Why is it so hard to meditate?
We could say that meditation is difficult because we are chronically overstimulated. Our modern-day comprises an endless stream of tasks, prompts, thoughts and actions. Culturally we are the proverbial headless chicken.
An important truth about the human brain is that it operates on neural networks. Suppose you have neural networks that are dedicated to being busy busy busy all day every day; those networks are habitually active because that’s what they do. Asking them to stop is a little like trying to stop a bullet train just by stepping up in front of it. It’s impossible. We all intrinsically know this, but still, we are not very forgiving when trying to meditate ‘effectively’.
A more constructive and practical way to respond to the question, ‘why is it so hard to meditate?’ would be to say that it isn’t difficult. Meditation is only difficult if you tell yourself it’s about instantly switching off your mind.
The truth is that meditation isn’t about switching the mind off or being in a constant deep state of relaxation. Meditation is about flexing ‘self-awareness’ as a muscle. It is about doing so with a healthy acceptance of the fact that nobody bench presses 200kg on their first visit to the gym and that many of us may never bench-press 200kg, both of which are okay. It is also okay that our minds don’t just switch off in our first or sometimes even our thousandth meditation session.
Why is it so hard to meditate?
We could say that meditation is difficult because we are chronically overstimulated. Our modern-day comprises an endless stream of tasks, prompts, thoughts and actions. Culturally we are the proverbial headless chicken.
An important truth about the human brain is that it operates on neural networks. Suppose you have neural networks that are dedicated to being busy busy busy all day every day; those networks are habitually active because that’s what they do. Asking them to stop is a little like trying to stop a bullet train just by stepping up in front of it. It’s impossible. We all intrinsically know this, but still, we are not very forgiving when trying to meditate ‘effectively’.
A more constructive and practical way to respond to the question, ‘why is it so hard to meditate?’ would be to say that it isn’t difficult. Meditation is only difficult if you tell yourself it’s about instantly switching off your mind.
The truth is that meditation isn’t about switching the mind off or being in a constant deep state of relaxation. Meditation is about flexing ‘self-awareness’ as a muscle. It is about doing so with a healthy acceptance of the fact that nobody bench presses 200kg on their first visit to the gym and that many of us may never bench-press 200kg, both of which are okay. It is also okay that our minds don’t just switch off in our first or sometimes even our thousandth meditation session.
Making Meditation Easy
Meditating in its purest form is simply the act of observing.
Some meditators sit and observe mind activity itself. Some meditators sit and observe the sounds in their environment. Some meditators observe a mantra where they repeat a word or collection of words repeatedly. Observing what’s happening is what meditation is as opposed to ‘doing’ or ‘thinking’ about what’s happening. This can seem like a pointless or boring endeavour to the brain, but that is the same part of the brain that holds all the stress, anxiety, depression, PTSD and insomnia. So it’s healthy to be sceptical of that part of the brain that thinks just observing seems a bit pointless.
If we reframe meditation as ‘the act of sitting and observing what’s happening’, and if we accept that on the other side of that ‘boring’, ‘silly’ or ‘unproductive’ activity, there is a huge number of benefits on offer. Then for those willing to do it repeatedly, meditation starts to feel a bit less difficult and more accessible. It becomes more approachable.
But there is one more thing that we need to accept before we are ready to start meditating without frustration and difficulty.
Sitting and observing must not be undertaken with the expectation that we will ‘be aware’ constantly for the duration of our meditation sessions. We are deeply entrenched in the lifelong habit of jumping on the ‘brain train’ whenever it leaves the station. This means there will be times when we are listening to the sound of the rain on the window or focusing on our breathing, but there will be lots of other times when we jump on the ‘brain train’ and go off on a 5-minute tangent—completely forgetting that we were supposed to be meditating.
The key to meditating without frustration is not to try to switch the mind off but to accept that we will jump on the ‘brain train’ regularly. The key to getting the benefits of meditation is to do it, repeating daily over time.
How To Meditate Easily
There are several ways in which meditation can be made a lot easier for beginners and veterans alike. Here we will look at three types of meditation that make the whole process much more accessible and inviting. Some are more like traditional meditation techniques; others lean into guided meditation which can help keep the brain on track during the meditation session.
Sometimes the simplest solutions are the ones that work best, which is great news. A simple listening meditation can be highly effective and is a favourite of many experienced meditators.
Step One
- Find a comfortable sitting position. Being comfortable is essential. There’s no need to sit super upright like a monk; using some support is okay.
Step Two
- Identify a low-level persistent sound in your environment.’ The air conditioning, the sound of birds or the wind. It doesn’t matter as long as it’s a relatively low-key, constant sound.
Step Three
- Sit quietly with your eyes shut and listen intently to the sound. When you notice that you have stopped listening and you’re off on a thought train, come back to the sound and continue listening.
If you maintain listening focus of 10 to 20% of your mediation session, you will be doing well. As time goes by, it will get easier to spend more time listening and less time thinking. As this happens, the benefits of doing daily meditation will become apparent during everyday life.
Meditations focusing on visualisation can be highly effective at making life more enjoyable and successful. The benefits of visualisation span one’s entire life situation, from improved relationships and work to better mental health and reduced symptoms of conditions like PTSD, depression, anxiety disorders, and insomnia.
The meditation session in this link is easy because it’s guided and only takes 25 minutes to complete. Although for best effects, it’s recommended to be completed in the morning, of course, you can complete it in the evening if necessary.
Visualisation meditations are a good option for folk who feel meditation is boring or hard to do. Having someone’s voice guide you through visualisation keeps you on track and is a bit less ‘boring’ than listening to the aircon.
Meditations that are geared towards emotional healing can be one of the most effective ways to change your life and mental health for the better over time. So much of our unhappiness comes from the little wounds and hurts we have stored in our subconscious.
Healing meditations resolve conflict and painful memories within the subconscious, helping to reconnect parts of the subconscious that have become disconnected and dysfunctional. Many of the best healing meditations work on the theory that we have an ‘inner child’ in our subconscious that is the one that finds it difficult to let go of trauma and insecurities. Whether this is true is not important; the fact is, it seems to be a very effective way to work through problems.
The meditation in this link is by a lady called Tara Brach, one of the trailblazers in emotional healing and healing meditations. It doesn’t take long and can be done daily but sometimes break are needed while you integrate the things that come up during each meditation session.
Conclusion
So the idea that meditation is difficult is little more than an urban myth, based on some fundamental misunderstandings and some romanticise notions of what meditation is.
This piece of fake meditation news needs to be debunked. As a global collective, our mental health is extremely poor. In many ways, our struggle with mental health and chronic pain in 2022 is not dissimilar to how dental disease was managed in the 1600s. In other words, we could and should be doing better. When future humans look back, they will undoubtedly be horrified by the level of suffering we went through with our mental health. They will also probably look back in astonishment that meditation wasn’t taught at schools and be dumbfounded as to why people thought it was difficult.
There is no doubt in the minds of anyone who has stuck with meditation that if we can move past our misconceptions, we’ll see that it’s easy and enjoyable, and our/your world will end up being a far, far better place.